#doesn't bear thinking about tbh
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It's my 13 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳
#i talk#13 year tumblrversary#tumblr milestone#i've been away for a bit but was absolutely SHOOK to receive this notification#I FEEL ANCIENT#prep me for the nursing home already#the things i've witnessed....#doesn't bear thinking about tbh#text post
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i saw someone on reddit say that turnabout revolution sucked because apollo had pretty much no reaction to watching jove's last moments compared to his breakdown when he found out dhurke was dead and like. yeah man. he literally says, earlier in the case, that he never really gave enough of a shit about jove to ask about him because he never knew him and considered dhurke his dad ("[...] Plus, I always thought of Dhurke as my dad, so I never really brought it up."/"(My real dad... I was never really interested in learning about him. [...])"). he got curious enough about him when dhurke gave him the photo to ask for whatever details they knew but he still didn't KNOW the guy at all. why would he have the same reaction to his final moments as discovering that the man who raised him was dead.
#i kind of like his apathy tbh it gives me a kind of basis for how i think he'd react to thalassa's big reveal#i don't think he's gonna really care all that much about the fact that she's his mom if i'm being honest. he's an adult. he doesn't#need a mom like a child would or anything. and the one parent he Does actually want back is already dead and gone. SO#i think he'd just be more angry about the fact that phoenix was keeping shit from him for the millionth time and this time it's Personal#i think he'd eventually build some sort of distant-ish relationship with thalassa for trucy's sake. he'd be polite. he'd meet up with#her sometimes for food or something. he'd bear the weight of her staring at him like he's still the baby she lost in the fire.#he'd be curious about her too. he'd ask her questions like he asked everyone else about jove. but he's long past#the point of needing a mother and it would Show.#anyway.
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season three of the way home and I'm back on my nonsense
#let's see how long it'll last what with spring semester starting this week#on one hand I get that del would know her son. she'd know it was him. but on the other I feel like it's been so long#that she'd be suspicious if it were really him idk it all felt too quick?#like okay del knows now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#I feel like the problem is that the conversation happened off screen so we don't see much of a reaction#but even after that del doesn't seem to think much of it#I feel very thrown back into the series it's been so long#really should've rewatched the other seasons I barely remember anything rip#the way home hallmark#earl crow ramblings#also realizing that I might have entirely missed some of the end of season two how did that happen I don't know#girl help why was my first thought upon seeing jacob without his beard is that they should put some eyeliner on him and he'll look like#he's in some emo band from the 2000s or smth#I think they chose such a good actor for him#del handing jacob his bear and saying he's been waiting for you OH MY WORD I'll cry#EW I forgot about sam get him OUT#WHAT have they done to alice oh my word what's going on#what's with susanna??#oh they combed jacob's hair he looks normal again though tbh I like how it was before#good episode!! pacing felt off imo but okay it's the first episode of a new season
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The way his thoughts get stuck on Jurand. During his own wedding.
#the trouble with peace#leo dan brock#the first law#joe abercrombie#the age of madness#jurand#leo/jurand#the perfect definition of his lips...#also i love this whole passage tbh#the bit about how he isn't danger of violent death but is nonetheless terrified#the bit about how there are different kinds of courage#the bit about finree & ardee smiling at him and giving him strength#amd then glokta glowers at him and undoes the ladies' support lmao#leo is sooo adorable when he's vulnerable#also i love it when he thinks 'good old' jurand#there's something so pining about it#like he doesn't have the words to describe how much jurand means to him#good old jurand#like he's his childhood dog#or a favourite teddy bear#the deepest love he can bestow
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Firm believer in Hurley becoming the guardian being his bad ending
#hi I'm thinking about the Lost ending but can't make an actual post because I'm not finished with my rewatch and my sister follows me#tbh the more i think about it the more i genuinely hate the Lost ending#like it desperately wants us to see Jack as a hero for saving the world possibly but i genuinely can't see anything heroic about it because#of how before doing that he basically ruins Hurley's life#like we have all seen what Jacob is/isn't#and I'm gonna be so fr i don't think Hurley has what it takes to escape the cycle#also the biggest thing with Jack and Hurley there is that it's a consistent pattern#before they got back on the island Jack was basically psychologically torturing him to get him to come back#bear in mind Hurley had been institutionalized for 2 years at that point#fully believe this is why Hurley ended up going back#everyone keeps saying he has a choice but i straight up disagree because both Jack and Jacob are fucking w his mind so much#and in the end Hurley once again doesn't get a choice#it's either become the guardian or risk the world ending#and Jack is going in that cave to die whether he does or not#like it's rotten at the core because Jack and Hurley have a fundamental abusive power dynamic that clouds their entire relationship build on#Jack thinking he's superior because he is a doctor and Hurley is insane#i also think it sucks that a show that used to question destiny ends with Hurley having to follow it because that's what Jack wants#maybe his destiny was to be an artist or start his own restaurant or something#but no Sorry buddy Jack wants you to become god#also Fucked up that in New man in charge Hurley ends up taking Walt back to the island after everything Michael did to get him out#personal headcanon but i think at that point he's starting to change#also Kate is not Jack's fucking soulmate are you fucking serious#dude was severely abusive to her and you're telling me that they're meant to fucking be#Lost#Lost tv#Lost abc#Lost 2004#Hurley#Hugo Reyes
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genuinely always so shocked to see mirei hate. like literally god forbid women do anything.
#contra.txt#y5 haters in general... does playable haruka mean nothing to you...#DOES SHINADA TATSUO MEAN NOTHING TO YOU...#for legal reasons this is a joke people are allowed to feel however they want about whatever it's just viddy games#and i fully acknowledge y5 and its litany of flaws#of which there are certainly enough for any given individual to justifiably dislike/hate its entirety but I AM A Y5 LOVER THRU AND THRU#saejima's arc is just an arguably less interesting rehash of the one he had in 4?#(jail; jailbreak; betrayed by his lil buddy guy#but now we're sans the interesting character stuff of his feelings regarding the hit. & also i miss his hair.#& that's not even to say i think saejima is boring in y5 i think there's some interesting subtext to take away from his character#unique to this entry but it's pretty hard to deny how much is literally just y4 again but now he's bald)#BUT WHO GAFS he got buffed to hell gameplay-wise and punches bears now#and also baba's a great character and he doesn't have to do a whole chase minigame if a cop sees him anymore#bloated/unfocused feeling in general to the game?#WELL THAT'S JUST MORE CONTENT BABY!!! only a real issue if you're a completionist imo#+ are u telling me you don't wanna drive a taxi? u don't wanna play a video game in which the goal is to drive as normally as possible?#and i loveeeee multiple protagonists yay <3 y0 y4 and y5 are my favs so far lol (up to y6)#kiryu's inclusion in y5 also feels way more justified than in y4. he was so tacked on there i'm trying to remember what he even really did#other than tiger dropping as a boss fight before instantly forgetting how to tiger drop the second he became playable#and losing track of yasuko and getting tag-teamed by akiyama and tanimura (cough) and beating up daigo#but in exchange akiyama becomes the protag that feels kinda tacked on in y5. way less so than kiryu in y4 tho for sure#anyway. weird/strangely justified plot beats? WELL THAT'S JUST EVERY YAKUZA GAME#an arguably strange/poor writing choice for majima especially given how he ended up being written in y0?#well honestly other than the age thing i think it makes him more interesting... he's kinda fucked up!#but i do get why people are /really/ not a fan of it. ik i just said i think it makes him more interesting but if it gets retconned#or even just never mentioned again i wouldn't be surprised tbh#but additionally he's not even a major character in y5 so it feels like it's not really a significant complaint imo#anyway anyone can do this ('this' being acknowledging the flaws of a thing and then letting how much they otherwise enjoy#said thing determine how much they let said flaws influence their overall opinion) ...such is the beauty of subjectivity... i love you.#yakuza
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@authorleaandres bitches do be multishipping and crackshipping
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I am bitches
#bugbear#jewel the beetle#bark the polar bear#traditional art#traditional drawing#being a multishipper is so good tbh#you don't feel bad for liking other ships#and like#they have two hands!!!#anyways first time drawing jewel yipee#i think about how tall bark is regularly and then remembers that jewel is a fucking bug#he could squash her#but he doesn't!!!!
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It's always a bit concerning when different meta turns into something akin to discourse.
#did i miss like a whole chapter of tumblr stuff while i was at con ??#i stick by everyone has their right to their own opinions and interpretations and whatever#but i dislike how one singular person is considered the expert and is put on a pedestal.#to the point that they're mentioned when someone doesn't agree with a take#unless they're the creator i'm not taking what they say as canon. at all. widely accepted or not. because it /isn't/.#because widely accepted doesn't equal accurate or right#no matter how well researched it is either. because i still don't think one singular person is 100% right when it comes to /everything/.#except the creator or creators themselves#popularity is just popularity#also yeah i'm bias too because i really really dislike a lot of their takes and could counter a lot of them too but it's pointless.#there can be good interpretations and shitty interpretations. but that's the beauty of fandom spaces#thank you for coming to my tedtalk#personal#i would love to post my own meta and probably will sometime when i grow a second braincell. so it's a little less jumbled insanity.#also it's mostly krauser centric so that has little to no bearing on leon.#also we're talking about a series that's almost as old as me#that has multiple timelines and retcons and inconsistencies and a novelization and live action movies.#like /come on people./#we all know where i stand when it comes to ID too tbh
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The worst part of this is that I'm guaranteed to do it again. The entire purpose of these little guys (besides the appeal of ooooughhhhh little guys...) was to measure my abilities and to get a feel for plush making again (something I Could do but have always done extremely sparsely). These guys are prototypes. These guys are trial runs. Experimental in nature as I figure out exactly what techniques I want to employ in bigger projects. And maybe also figure out how to make a pattern along the way 🧍
#my ultimate dream is to make an alfonse who is made out of extremely soft nice materials#and have him be perfectly sized to be held in your arms while sleeping. probably standard teddy bear size?#but the shapes i'd be working w would be different. plus i am a little picky about the holdability of guys#the MOST holdable plush of mine of all time is a cylindrical bunny. i am not sure how to translate that.#i actually have some funny concepts though ... i'm thinking about my sleeping pikachu plush actually#also i have a thought to make it his spring alt. bnnuy....#but don't be shocked when this idea fades into obscurity and doesn't resurface in like a year. or longer#tbh i am extremely tempted to make more little guys. i have some concepts for moe that are WAY too good to pass up#and if i make a summoner...... then i shoulf make the commander........ the quartet.......#when it comes to bodies i am so committed to button joints rn. btw. i have A VISION#when making plushies i'm learning that it's good to have A Purpose in mind. and create them accordingly!
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Lilibear and Rachis are both furry OCs who were adapted into WoW but the way they go about it is different and it's pretty interesting to me
Lilibear was pretty much copy pasted 1:1 from my headworld to WoW. She lends herself pretty well to the setting as is, so there isn't much palpable difference between her iterations other than minor lore tweaks between them - but that means that WoW Lilibear doesn't have much of a story going on seeing as she isn't involved in any of my major WoW stories. OG Lilibear is much the same, but mostly because my headworld doesn't have much of a story either (also Lilibear is technically one of my fursonas so that contributes to a Lack of Lore tm)
Rachis on the other hand was adapted into WoW specifically to fulfil a role in a story, and her WoW iteration became Acácia. OG Rachis has about as much going on for her story wise as Lilibear, which means that now Rachis and Acácia feel like very different people despite still technically being the same character.
#i don't have a point to make i just think the differences between these two when it comes to wow are fascinating#wow lilibear fulfils p much the same role as og lilibear - that being a demonized bear/pandaren and hangin around doing fuck all#as is her right tbh#meanwhile acacia fills a role in an existing story while rachis similarly to lilibear just does fuck all#my furry headworld exists mostly for vibes tho so thats all aight#and if i stop to think about it probably a glaringly obvious reason for wow lilibear's lack of story is well. she doesn't have rust#because by god i tried adapting cinnarust into warcraft more times than i can count but he doesn’t wanna stay#he doesn't lend himself well to any other setting other than my headworld apparently#and without her bestie to bounce off of wow lilibear is just kinda there#vibing#blabbles
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random thought that refuses to leave me: i don't think kat is good with kids, really, nor interested in them. but little girls people tried to make into weapons and who didn't get enough love, like annie? young girls full of rage against what was done to them, like rell? katarina would take to them so easily. she would want to protect them.
#» out of character — ⌜main sup irl.⌟#i know rell is like I HATE NOXUS I HATE NOXIANS YOU ALL SHOULD DIE#but that just mkes it extra interesting for me to think about it#like? her needing to stick with kat for whatever reason and letting her in a bit because. katarina is so passionate and genuine tbh#if she doesn't have a reason to lie#and kat being who she is she absolutely would defend what rell suffered isn't what noxus is#and defend her idea of noxus which includes fighting people responsible for things like that#which doesn't mean ignoring what she went through or diminishing it#they can trade fucked up childhood stories#lmao#no but for real the found family au of this???? i want it#and annie is no different tbh except she's younger and that would make kat extra caring#like sure she killed people and has insane magical powers but#well kat doesn't care it's not like she wasn't trained to kill people from childhood#sure she has a teddy bear with a demon but we all have different prized possessions it's cool#iasuhdfiahsdifuh
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#hi sorry to ventpost on the poetry blog again#but i gotta write this out so i can get my brain to SHUT UP and maybe sleep. anyway.#its just so interesting because like. i fear there is something wrong with me. i fear i am in fact fucked up for no good reason#smth smth imposter syndrome except im the actual imposter#and like. the issue i keep coming back to right. there are two options.#either this is just The Way That I Am or it's some chemical imbalance in my brain that i inherited#so either i have to do work to change as an actual person or do work to find myself treatment#because again. no one is coming to save me. there is no miracle cure i can take to be a different person.#and the thing about me. i had changing. i hate doing work. i dont want to do any of that.#tbh the problem right now is i dont really want to do anything except read and sleep and stare at the wall so you know. par for the course.#but even under the best of circumstances im just. a lazy person. i dont want to do things and i dont.#and re: there are two options right. like fundamentally it doesn't matter because this is still something i am. who cares if its my fault.#i still have to deal with that. i still might just fucking torpedo my career and my life and every opportunity ive ever been given#because i simply can't be bothered. because i would rather waste my money and my time just fucking rotting.#and what gets to me the most is the opportunity part too. i am SO FUCKING LUCKY to have the people and the life and the resources i do#and yet im still like this#if it was just a question of me i think i'd be able to bear it#but thinking about all the people who took a chance on me and believe in me and like me for some fucking reason is crushing#and admitting i cant get it together would be letting them all down#but keeping on like this still feels horrible bc im similarly letting them down by lying and allowing them to believe im a good person#I KNOW THIS SOUNDS DRAMATIC but do keep in mind i am in fact actively lying and hiding and making up excuses. i promise there are fr issues#and like i know the important ppl will stay regardless but thats almost worse somehow?#im just so scared of going from a loved-because to a loved-despite#even though i think that's the best kind. but Its Different When Its Me because obviously it is#if it turns out i just need to switch meds im gonna feel so fucking stupid in a week#except this has been a reoccurring theme for much longer than that so. re: i fear this is just the way i am. sigh#okay enough this isnt doing shit time to pass out woooo#to delete
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synopsis. you’ve been deliberately dodging atsumu miya. he wants to know why.
pairing. atsumu miya x fem!reader | wc. 2.0k (it wasn’t even supposed to be this long) | genres. (implied) university au, tbh i don’t even know what this dynamic is, he calls us princess, reader’s kinda bad emotionally, rain confessions
notes. for my birthday (not gojo’s eff him (/j)) i decided why not take one of my favorite tropes of all time and pair it w the loml. you’re so welcome. this is very dialogue heavy, barely proofread, and a hot mess, but i hope you enjoy regardless.
"(y/n)." the very familiar, sultry yet aggravating voice says the moment you step out of the cafe.
"oh my god!" you jump, clutching a hand over your heart that skipped a beat. it's immediately followed with a glare towards atsumu. "what the fuck, miya? you don't just come up to people like that."
"sorry." atsumu apologizes but his nose scrunches at the word. "nah, not really. didn't know how else to get to ya."
"so you had to find me at my job?" you raise an eyebrow in disbelief.
he shrugs. "yer really not leavin' me with any other choice."
"what are you on about?" you roll your eyes as you take a sharp left, carefully exhaling out. the street is nearly deserted now that the sun sunk past the horizon, leaving only the street lights and the moon to illuminate what would be a pitch black scene. puddles of water are scattered along the walkways, remnants of the downpour that occurred earlier in the day. you had clocked out later than usual, and the next flash of rain is predicted to fall within the next few minutes. you want to get back to your dorm before the worst of it happens.
"ya know what i'm talking about." atsumu huffs. "yer clearly avoiding me."
your shoulders tense when he brings it up, and you pray that atsumu doesn't catch it. "i'm not." you lie, your heart speeding up.
"yer a shit liar. i hope ya know that." atsumu shuts you down right then and there. the fact he's able to makes you wince. that's one of the many bones you have to pick with him. he can always see right through you, and it allows him to get under your skin easily since he knows exactly what to say if he wants to get a reaction out of you.
it's because of that reason that you've been avoiding him. you know yourself well enough that if you were to stand face to face with atsumu miya as you are now, he'd figure out the secret that you've been hiding for two weeks.
atsumu presses his lips together, sighing once he realizes that all he'll get from you from this point forward is silence, but he tries his luck anywayy. "can we talk?"
you let his question fizzle out in the air, continuing down the sidewalk as atsumu follows by your side. the first drops of drizzle fall onto your hand and cheek. atsumu feels them too.
"look, it's gonna rain soon. could ya at least let me take ya home? yer gonna get soaked." atsumu gently reaches out for your hand. the sudden contact and its spark of heat makes you jump. instinctively, you yank your hand away from him. your widened eyes snap towards him, and shame washes over you. maybe the street lights are playing tricks on you, but you swear there's a flicker of hurt in his gaze. you turn away from him because you can't bear the sight of it.
"are ya mad at me? did i do somethin' to upset ya?" atsumu continues.
no, you answer in your head. you can't trust yourself to say it out loud without betraying anything else. it's not that.
"(y/n), please. talk to me." atsumu pleads. you don't think you've ever heard such desperation in his voice before. you've never seen him so raw. it's almost enough to break you, but you refuse to let go the threads of your resolve. the rain is picking up; it's cold as it soaks the threads of your clothes.
"princess." atsumu throws in as a last ditch effort. you know it is because it's the one nickname that gets you riled up the most. it sparks a reaction that atsumu knows will get you talking, but unbeknownst to him it's not for the reason he expects. he wants you to snap with anger, but all your heart does is ache. all it does is melt you into putty in his hands.
"don't call me that." you finally come to a stop, turning so that you can face him, defeat in your gaze. atsumu's blond locks are beginning to lose volume; they stick to his forehead as droplets continue to fall. his hoodie is littered with small, dark stains, a physical consequence of the rain.
"oh now i got yer attention." atsumu scoffs, poking his tongue into the inside of his cheek.
"miya." you warn, voice shaking. he ignores it.
"yer not being yerself, and ya haven't been for the last two weeks." he tells you as if you don't already recognize it yourself. "what's goin' on with ya?"
"nothing!" you deny. "i'm fine!"
atsumu rolls his eyes. "cut the crap, princess."
"seriously, stop calling me that!" you spit back at him.
you're shivering. you can't tell if it's because of your cold, wet clothes or your frustration that keeps reaching new levels. you can sense it; you can sense that your heart is about to claw itself out of chest and dump itself onto the feet of atsumu miya. your hand fists the fabric of your soaked shirt as if to keep it in.
"then tell me what's wrong!" the blond in front of you demands, running a hand through his hair. his voice projects over the brutal force of the rain.
you grimace. that's the one thing you can't do, especially since it involves him. you bite your tongue, hiding your face so that atsumu doesn't see the glassiness of your eyes. "miya... please drop it." you ask him pathetically.
"why?" he pries. this is the other issue with him. he's so damn stubborn to the point that it's infuriating. atsumu miya never backs down until he gets what he wants.
"because it's you!" the first wave of tears break free. they cascade down your cheeks, mixing in the stream of rain on your cheeks; all while your hand remains pointed at atsumu. "because i fell for you!"
atsumu shuts his mouth, going completely silent. you shake your head, laughing bitterly. "i bet you didn't expect that, did you? believe me, i didn't either. day in and day out all we've ever done was argue so i don't know how this happened. i don't know why i have these feelings for you."
wiping your face is a futile attempt yet you still do it anyway. a sob gets caught in your throat, and you choke on it. "i can't stop thinking about you. i can't be near you without my heart attempting to leap out of chest. and so yeah, i've been avoiding you miya, and it's because you've made me so damn weak."
your stare finds atsumu's. you can't get a read on him, but you don't have to second guess that he can see the pain swirling in your eyes. it's so humiliating that even now the first thing that crosses your mind is how good he looks even as you feel your heart being torn apart. his hair is completely stuck to his forehead. his blond ends that are soaked through and through drip their excess water onto his face. you want nothing more than to brush them out of his line of sight, but you can't. you fight that desire by balling up your fists.
"so please just leave me alone. stop trying to find me because i can't take this anymore." you beg through hiccups.
you wait for a response. you wait to see if atsumu will kick your heart aside. in an even better scenario, which is far from likely, he accepts it. you'll take either or.
but he does neither, and that's fine too. you leave atsumu by himself on the sidewalk, and your lack of presence pulls him out of his trance. he jogs to catch up to you, reaching from behind to clasp your hand in his.
"miya, let go-"
"no." he says firmly, a newfound fire burning behind his eyes, one that exceeds the one you feel on your hand. the sight makes you gulp. "ya can't just confess yer feelings for me and leave."
you chuckle weakly, trying to pull yourself free from his grasp. "i think i can."
"no, ya can't. ya didn't even give me a chance to say anythin'." atsumu argues. he doesn't relinquish the hold he has on you.
"what more do you have to say? you don't feel the same, and that's fine-"
"could ya stop assuming things?! i never even said that." atsumu squeezes your hand ever so lightly in frustration. "and by the way, i'm not gonna leave ya alone. i'll follow ya to the edge of the earth if i have to."
you're still crying at this point, and atsumu's words are only making you more upset. "why?! why are you so fixated on me?! why can't you just-"
"because i'm in love with ya!"
in that moment, you swear the rain stops in its place, suspended in the air. surely, you must've been hearing things wrong. atsumu miya, the guy who has everyone dancing to the tune of his hand, is- no that doesn't even sound right. how could he possibly-
"god, i've been in love with ya for so long." atsumu laughs, like it's a relief to finally get it off his chest. "but ya nearly ripped my heart to shreds over these past two weeks."
atsumu squeezes your hand before letting it fall to your side. his own flex by his side as if to hold himself back. "(y/n), ya can insult me to yer heart's content if that's what makes ya happy, but don't dodge me like i'm the damn plague. i hate it. i really do."
atsumu picks up his tear-filled eyes; it makes your own fall even faster because you realize that this hurts him. you want to apologize, but the words are backed up in your throat. your cries steal away your ability to speak.
so you pull him in, yanking him by the drenched fabric of his hoodie and closing the distance between you two. your lips crash onto his, praying that this action is enough for him to understand. it takes a moment for atsumu to react, he's unmoving against you, and once he realizes what's happening, he relaxes. his hands fly to your neck, resting one on either side as he kisses you back.
it's carnivorous. he kisses you like he's been deprived of you. you feel how badly atsumu's been wanting this, how long he's been waiting for this day. you can barely keep up with his hunger. it's hot enough to overpower the chill that comes with the rain beating down on both of you. you'd kiss him forever if you could, but your lungs are begging for air.
when you pull away, atsumu's eyes reveal that he's in a daze, a happy one, like he just came back from soaring through the clouds. his damp hair presses onto your forehead as you both catch your breaths.
he pulls back. atsumu wears a soft grin as he admires you, even though you probably look like a wet dog. one of his hands find their way up to your cheek. you look at him expectantly. "(y/n), i want all of ya. i want yer stubborn ass attitude and yer insults. i want ya to be the only person who can bring me back down to earth. i want yer smiles and all yer laughs. i want to continue lovin' ya." he professes with complete certainty. his flowery words make you beam so brightly that it makes your cheeks hurt.
"i'll give you all of that and more." you swear. "but miya, i need you to kiss me again."
"oh? it seems like i got myself a needy princess." atsumu smirks, but he's already leaning in.
"shut up."
"gladly." atsumu agrees, pressing his lips to yours, smiles on both your faces.
you catch the flu the day after, and so does atsumu. but man, it is so, so worth it.
#anime#manga#haikyuu#hq#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#hq fluff#hq angst#atsumu miya#atsumu x reader#atsumu fluff#atsumu angst#⭑ — fics ⭑.ᐟ♡#♡ — hq#♡ — tsumu
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want more, rafe cameron
When reader and Rafe have been sneaking around with each other for the last two months, y/n can't help but want more. Bringing this up with him, she's under the impression he's embarrassed to be seen with a pogue.
warnings: swearing, insecurities, arguing, mentions of sex, angst, always a sucker for a happy ending though, it's a looong one <33
pairing: rafe cameron x fwbpogue!reader
Y/n was sat on the little bench outside her small home, right by the water as the wind blew through her hair. Her knees were tucked up to her chin as the kook boy who usually plagued her thoughts did just that, sink into her mind.
It was never meant to be more than a good time, something to pass the summer. He made her feel good - in more ways than one - he would take her out on dates, whisper sweet words to her, and the way he looked at her. She could swear he was in love, that he was just as infatuated with her as she was him. But the way he only took her to private and secluded places, the way his words were the most affectionate when he was deep inside her, the way he would put space between them whenever he saw someone he recognised. These small things, things he may not even realise he does, they all reminded her that she wasn't anything to him. He would never let himself fully be hers, he could never let his reputation fall like that.
He gave her just enough that she felt completely and utterly consumed by him. Craved his attention, his touch, even a small message would complete her day. However, as time went on she knew she needed more, she knew that she couldn't bear much more before she completely lost herself to please him.
"Come over" The message catches her attention, the illuminated screen laying on the bench beside her pulling her from her wandering thoughts.
She knew the message was from Rafe before her eyes even flicked to the screen, she never really had anyone else calling on her. It wasn't that she didn't have any friends, but she wasn't one to go out and the friends she kept knew that.
A couple weeks ago, she would've been on her way to his before she could even start replying, no thought needed except the thought of being in his proximity. Now, however, she was tired. Tired and sad, feeling pathetic really after spending so long thinking about him.
"feeling tired tonight. sorry, rafe" She replies slowly, her heart pounding as she sends it. She turns her phone back off, yet before she can place her phone back down her screen lights up with another message from him.
"Please, baby. I need you" He responds, her heart sinks. She doesn't know how much more she can stand up for herself, fighting that craving feeling she has for him.
"not in the mood rn tbh" She tries to stay strong, holding onto that tiny bit of dignity she has left in her.
"Don't even need to fuck"
"Just wanna be close to you"
Her heart pounds faster and her breathing is shaky. Fingers hovering over her illuminated screen. Every possible message she could write spinning though her head.
"you can come over then" She types out, deletes and types out again. She had never been so unsure in herself before, never doubted her own thoughts like this. But she sends it, stopping herself from contemplating and worrying further.
Rafe had been to her place a couple of times before, only ever to pick her up. Each visit shorter than the last, hurrying to leave as if humiliated to be caught in such a place. It made her feel ashamed of who she was, how she grew up and she felt even more embarrassed that she let a guy make her feel so insecure about something that could never change, something that literally made her who she was.
"Coming" The phone lights up for a last time in her hands and when her eyes run over the message she is filled with surprise and even more shame as her heart warms for him. She knows that him visiting her is the bare minimum. That being able to step foot in the place she calls home should not be seen as a difficult task. But she feels happy that he's coming to see her because he wants to.
She sits with her pathetic thoughts as she waits for him. Curling up on the bench as she watches the way the pearly moonlight glimmers across the waves perfectly. The soft wind sending chills down her spine and strands of her hair across her face.
"Y/n?" She hears his voice call out and for a moment she feels like she's lost hers. "Baby?"
"Yeah, around here" She replies softly as she sees him bend round the corner of her home. She has a tiny smile on her face, never fully reaching her eyes.
"Something wrong, pretty girl?" He mutters softly as he moves to sit next to her on the bench. He's dressed in sweats and she can only assume he's been relaxing at home prior to coming over. He gently takes her bare legs and slides them onto his lap. He can't help but let his eyes rake over her perfect body. The way she looks so small in his shirt he must've let her borrow once and some pyjama shorts. Yet for the first time, he puts aside his vulgar thoughts because he can tell she's unhappy.
Her eyes look into his, the way he's cracked open her feelings so easily, reading her like a book despite keeping a wall up of his own. Her breath shaky again as she gives a small shrug, her eyes dropping down to his hands. The way his thumb gently runs back and forth over her knee.
"Talk to me" He says softly, the crease between his brows deepening as he loses her gaze.
"Do you even care?" She voices gently. Not looking at him, to maintain the little power she has left over herself.
"What?" He mumbles with confusion, his body straightening up as he didn't expect such blunt thoughts from her.
"Do you even care that I'm upset? Or what I'm upset about?" She mumbles a bit louder as her gaze moves back over to the glistening waves ahead of them.
"O-of course I do, I don't understand?" He mutters as his thumb stops the stroking and instead slides to her chin, moving her face to look at him.
"I mean we aren't dating, and it feels like you've never really cared about how I feel outside the sex." She tells him for the first time. The tension feels suffocating, yet at the same time the weight off her shoulders is so liberating.
"That's what you think?" He asks her, a strong tone of annoyance or maybe disappointment.
The eye contact between them so intense that she feels as though she needs to take a deep breath before replying or she might pass out. "That's exactly how it feels." She admits gently with a shrug.
"That's not what this is." He says firmly, shaking his head as his hand slips off her chin and runs down his face with a huff.
"You're embarrassed to be seen with me. Face it, Rafe. It's not like we're dating. You only keep me around for a good fuck." She says shakily, running off adrenaline and the fact that there's no use stopping now that she's started.
"You don't embarrass me, I'm just not ready to make things official." He tells her unwaveringly, yet his eyes darting towards the water, the ground, her. Everything about his body and words make him seem so secure in himself. Yet his eyes express all his true emotions, how hesitant and insecure he really feels.
"God, Rafe. You can barely be seen with me, and I can't bear to be just some girl you fuck and take out secretly." She tells him, her throat feeling scratchy and sore as her eyes water lightly. She curses herself for getting so emotional, it wasn't even that serious yet she couldn't keep herself together.
His heart breaks, pained as she expresses her feelings to him, pained as he watches her fall apart in front of him. "I'm sorry for making you feel that way." He mutters gently.
"Don't be. You never promised me anything more than what you've given me." She shakes her head gently, as her eyes look at the side of his face.
"I want to give you more, I want to promise you the world." He whispers with his head in his hands.
"I can't continue feeling like this, Rafe." She tells him softly, "I can't handle craving you privately."
"I didn't know you felt like this..." He replies shamefully, his hands sliding down his face as he turns to look at her with torment. His eyes are glossy and his jaw is clenched, he doesn't know what there is to say to make this better.
"Don't bullshit." She mumble with a soft frown, not believing for a second that he didn't know she was completely infatuated with him.
"No, y/n. I mean it. I've... I feel for you. And I don't know how to handle it, express it. Fuck. I'm a mess, baby." He spills to her helplessly. "If I knew how I was hurting you, I would've done something, said something. I just- it's so difficult for me." His voice rasps and cracks unsteadily.
She doesn't know what to say, heart pounding as she watches his sincerity. She fiddles with her fingers anxiously as she tries to think of anything to reply with.
"Please believe me, pretty girl" He practically whimpers, his hands itching to feel her near him.
"What are we gonna do?" She whispers as she looks down at her hands. "Something needs to change... I can't go on like this" She tells him.
"I wanna make you mine." He tells her, giving in to his desperation to be close to her as his hand moves to rest on her anxiously fidgeting fingers.
"What's holding you back?" She mumbles as her eyes remain glued to their hands, fluttering closed for a moment as she soaks in the warmth of his hand.
"I-I don't know. I just, I feel so stupid because I want to give you the world but I'm the one stopping myself from giving it to you." He opens up quietly, his eyes boring into the side of her face. "But I know I need you, for more than just your body. I need you in every way I can have you." He whispers to her, gently pulling her closer so that his lips brush the shell of her ear. His closeness, warmth and the way his breath tickles her ear shoots a shiver down her spine.
"Please let me have you."
(a/n: i had to end it there or i would keep writing all night, i hope you all enjoyed!!)
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#obx fic#obx#obx season 4#rafe obx#rafe x reader#pogue reader#rafe x fwb!reader
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Dating Fred and George Weasley Headcanons
MDNI, 18+, NSFW
Masterlist Requests/Asks: OPEN (please read) Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader x George Weasley Request: Not a request just wanted to write to fight writer's block. TW: Sexual Situations, Kinks, Some Fluff, Pseudo-Twincest A/N: I feel like I ate with this, tbh. Been working on it for two mf days. 😮💨💞 I hope you enjoy! Comment here if you want to be added to the tag list for any/all HP content.
Please feel free to let me know how you feel about this. Comments and reblogs are always appreciated. ✨💞
How you got together:
You had been friends with them forever, but you never expected them to have the same feelings towards you as you did for them. None of you were willing to admit it until it was called out by Ginny and her loud ass mouth when she told you guys to 'just fucking kiss already, for Merlin's sake.'
They had just finished a match against Slytherin and won, of course, so their adrenaline was already flooding. You had opened your mouth to fire back at Ginny with some sarcastic ass comment when Fred grabbed your face and smashed his lips to yours, stealing the breath right out of your lungs.
When Fred finally pulled back, your head was in a daze, and before you could suck in a breath, George grabbed you by your waist, dipped you, and kissed you with the same passionate intensity.
After that, everything else was history, and the only thought any of you could form was, 'Why didn't we do this sooner?'
Fred
Song that best describes your relationship with Fred:
Good Girls Go Bad - Cobra Starship (Iykyk)
Nicknames he has for you:
Darling: His go-to nickname, he uses it all of the time.
Love: Uses this one when he is being extra lovey, or giving you presents.
Sweetheart: (this one is for when you're in trouble and he wants you to know it)
Kinks:
Biting: Fred loves to bite you while he's fucking you. Leaving trails of bite marks all over your neck and going down your collarbones and, especially, between your thighs when he's eating you out. Though he never breaks the skin, he does bite hard enough to bruise. Fred's biggest turn-on is the sounds that leave your lips when he bites down hard and then licks and kisses the same spot, melting pain with pleasure until you can't tell the difference.
Bit of an exhibitionist: Nothing revs Fred up more than the risk of getting caught, especially if it's George walking in when he has you bent over, face down, ass up. He knows you're with George, too, but it's not necessarily about who catches you two in the act. It's about simply being caught.
"Looks like we've been caught, darling," he taunts with a dark chuckle and pulls your head back by your hair to make you look at George while he pile drives into you from behind. "Show Georgie how good I make you feel. Come on, let him hear how I make you scream."
Begging: Hearing you beg, 'Just fuck me already,' almost makes him break and do it. His response? Shoving his cock down your throat, all the while taunting you with little phrases like, 'What was that, darling? Didn't quite catch that,' or 'But you look so good, down on your knees begging for me.' He will definitely give you what you want, but only after tears are running down your cheeks as your need becomes almost too much to bear. Almost. He's not a complete sadist, after all.
Honorable Mentions:
Hair Pulling I mean, need I say more?
Teasing at the MOST inappropriate times, family dinner? Ha, his fingers are right at the apex of your thighs, silently challenging you to keep your facial expressions schooled.
Breeding Kink: You think he doesn't fantasize about filling you up so fucking full with cum, that it's only thanks to your birth control you haven't gotten pregnant yet? That's fucking adorable.
Favorite Positions:
Face down, ass up: What's not to love? It's the perfect position for Fred to slam into you at the brutal pace that leaves you cock-drunk. Perfect for him to either hold your hips still or slam you back onto his cock to match his pace, all the while leaving perfect little fingertip bruises on your hips. Even better is when he pulls you back, flush to his chest, a large hand holding just under your chin, supporting your weight while he leaves a trail of bite marks down your neck and shoulders while you whimper and plead for mercy, not that you actually want it, he just loves to hear you beg.
Against a wall: Being the exhibitionist he is, Fred will fuck you any and everywhere. An empty classroom, a broom closet, the locker room after an intense quidditch match, win or lose, he doesn't care. So long as he gets you. But there is just something about holding you up with your legs wrapped around him, back pinned to the wall (or a locker), that makes Fred fucking feral. The way he can watch your pupils blow with arousal, your lips part and quiver as your orgasm crashes into you like a fucking freight train, the way you tug on his hair as if you're trying to keep some semblance of grounding as you feel your soul leave your body. Fuck, he's sure he's never seen a more beautiful sight in his entire life.
Spit roasting: When you're on all fours on the bed (or anywhere, really), and he pounds into you while you suck off George. Fucking you so hard it forces you to take more of George down your throat. What are brothers for? He's not sexually attracted to George, but there's nothing like watching you take his other half while he slams into you. Both of them work in a delicious and synchronized rhythm, filling you up so full that you might just burst, will burst. Body trembling while George offers you sweet praise and Fred reaches around your body, rubbing tight and fast circles over your clit; all the while, they drag you further and further down to hell or up to heaven. Is there even a difference anymore?
Random Head Canons:
Fred is more possessive, not so much that you're not allowed to have friends of the opposite sex. He knows full well he can trust you to tell him if someone makes you uncomfortable. He knows damn well you're not going to be fucking around with anyone else, given how fucking incredible he and George make you feel. Possessive in the aspect that he will brutally, if not mercilessly, prank anyone who so much as looks at you in any way that isn't platonic.
When you chastise him for these methods, he stops because you are bloody terrifying when you're truly angry. He switches to pulling you onto his lap or brushing your hair over your shoulder in front of them to reveal the litter of bite marks he made or the hickies that George made all over your neck, all with the cockiest fucking smirk on his face.
Fred's Ideal Date: While he loves being buried deep inside of you, he loves treating you to an adventure. His favorite? Walking into the forbidden forest, finding the perfect place to swim (he found the best swimming hole with a ledge to jump off of.) In the warmer months, he'll pack a lunch and take you here, loving the adrenaline rush of jumping and diving off of the small cliff ledge. Swimming behind the waterfall and exploring the caves inside with you. In the colder months, he will challenge you to a snowball fight in the courtyard, George is allowed, too, of course, but one of them will always be on your side against the other. Otherwise it's not really fair, is it?
George
Song that best describes your relationship with George:
Ride - SoMo
Nicknames he has for you:
Baby/Baby girl: Uses this as a placement for your name.
Little One: Uses this when he's teasing you; typically whispers it in your ear when his hands are around your waist. Or when he is watching Fred fuck you before he steps in and joins.
Mine/Ours: Uses this one the most in the bedroom when either he or both of them are fucking you.
Kinks:
Hickies: While Fred loves biting, George is a little more gentle. Note that I said a little. He'll fuck you like a whore in church, but he prefers to drag out the pleasure by sucking the soft skin right behind your ear all the way down your body down to your clit, right to his favorite part on your body, which brings me to my next point-
Eating you out: Holy. Fucking. Shit. If this was an Olympic sport, George would take the gold every single fucking time. Sure, Fred knows how to send you over the edge, but George takes his time. Licking and sucking your clit with slow, purposeful movements, drawing out sounds from your throat that sound inhuman. The way his fingers curl just fucking right inside of you, thrusting against that spongy spot inside of you, scissoring them to spread your walls and thrust his tongue in and out. Seriously, this man would live between your thighs if he could. Sending you over the edge again and again with just his devilish fucking tongue and fingers, he gets off on that shit, literally. This man has cum simply from eating you out before.
Edging: Remember how I said George is 'a little more gentle'? This is what I meant by that. George's favorite hobby when he's buried deep inside of you is bringing you right up to the edge, then pulling out, leaving you feeling empty as your walls clamp around nothing. You whine, and you whimper, and suddenly, he thrusts into you with a snap of his hips. Only to do it all over again.
"You want me to fill you up, baby? Is that what you want?" He teases as he only pushes his tip inside. You try to rock against him, to take him in deeper to satisfy the craving inside of you. "Hmm, I'm not sure you deserve it," he taunts as his thumb lands on your clit. Just as you open your mouth to beg, his hand grips your throat, and he slams into you so hard you see stars, his cock buried so deep that you swear you can feel him in your guts as he finally lets you cum with an Earth-shattering cry around him.
Honorable Mentions:
Choking: Because you know what would make you even more beautiful? A hand necklace. His, to be specific.
Bit of a voyeur: He loves watching you get pounded hard and fast when he typically fucks you hard and slow. The way your face contorts slightly differently when Fred is fucking you amuses him like no other.
Breeding Kink to the fucking MAX: He wants your pussy flooded with cum, if some spills out? No big deal, he'll fuck it right back into you. And after you finish school? Yeah, that shit is going into the fucking trash. (But you have no arguments, tbh.)
Favorite Positions:
Riding him: Guiding your hips, thrusting up into you as your hands rest on his chest to hold yourself up. Sure, George is dominant. But that doesn't love to see the look on your face above him as you come apart, over and over again, until you're a sweaty, shaky mess. George doesn't mind reverse- cowgirl, but he'd much rather see your face as his hand wraps around your throat just hard enough to make you dizzy as he tosses you over the edge, following right behind you.
Missionary (hear me out): Who says missionary is boring? Not you. Sure, nothing beats a bed, but George prefers you laid out across his desk. Or with your legs thrown over his shoulders, ass hanging over the bed as he stands and pounds into you. His thrusts are slow and firm, sliding into the hilt and then grinding against your core, making damned sure to draw out every last moan your body can produce.
Between him and Fred: George is not biased when it comes to fucking you in your ass or your pussy, if he's honest. So long as you're on your knees on the bed, while he's in either hole while Fred is in the other, both slamming into you with an animalistic ferocity. Filling you up so full with their cum that it'll be dripping out of you for days.
Random Head Canons:
George LOVES it when people stare/flirt with you. It drives Fred up the fucking wall when George doesn't try to brutally prank or show off just how much you're theirs. But it gets George off when guys try to flirt with you only to have a drink thrown at them, or you simply laugh at them before pointing out him and Fred. While Fred's anger is palpable, George just winks at you with a shit-eating grin on his face. Maybe it's the voyeur in him, but he loves watching you interact with people, male or female, because he knows you're not going anywhere except right back to him and Fred.
George's Ideal Date: George loves to fly with you on his broom, you in front of him as he grips the broom between your thighs. His favorite time to do it is at night, flying up so high you swear you can almost touch the stars as you soar over the clouds. You know this is what you two are doing when he bundles you up in one or maybe two of his sweaters. Because Merlin forbid you get cold. If it's too cold to fly or it's snowing, he loves to take a walk to Hogsmeade and share a butterbeer. So long as he's spending time with you, he couldn't be happier.
I hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I loved writing it. Please don't forget to reblog and comment! ✨✨🤞🏻😇
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2024 f2 boys when you’re on your period | f2 grid picks! x afab!reader
i tried to keep is as gender neutral as possible, i hope you enjoy! i’m still not over this season tbh, so this is me celebrating all the wonderful we made watching f2 this year! most iconic podiums, best battles and the most amazing lineup. it was a pleasure to enjoy this ride with all of you
pairing(s): ollie bearman x afab!reader, kimi antonelli x afab!reader, zane maloney x afab!reader, paul aron x afab!reader, pepe marti x afab!reader, luke browning x afab!reader;
warning(s): mentions of blood?, periods in general, maybe innuendo?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3912c0f6884d2f73e59cdb77cb5af1ee/39260d2b7228ac90-9e/s540x810/190d9fb3558c4a326efeba96e842a88b0d1c9fde.jpg)
ollie bearman | prema—> haas f1
surprisingly shy about it!
doesn’t want to hurt you in any way, since you’re so sensitive and sore all over
figures its better to not say anything when you’re having an outburst
just watches you with puppy dog eyes and whisperes “can i do anything for you?”
you either burst into tears or scream at him for being so clueless and then also cry into his chest
so he just makes tea
he doesn't really know how to cook, but the british upbringing made him an excellent tea brewer
or so he tells you, knowing it makes you roll your eyes and chuckle
kimi antonelli | prema —> mercedes amg petronas
so so eager to do anything for you!
but kimi might be quite confused about things, especially if you have some weird cravings lol
he’s going to joke about those brownies or steaks, even if you get mad with him, he doesn’t understand he overstepped until you’re really upset with him
so desperate to get you to forgive him
my boy is panicking
turns into a real-life teddy bear
too scared to say anything and trusts that physical contact with do the talking for him
would put on your favourite movie and press kisses all over your cute face until you pout
"please don't pout, tesoro. can i do anything to make you smile again?"
zane maloney | rodin —> formula e
takes this time as an opportunity to get to know you even better
long talks when you can’t sleep bc of cramps and soreness
makes it a point to ask about everything and anything you might need during this time
absolutely ridiculously in love with you, this guy, i swear
has a list of things to do before you get your period
"why would you have a period tracker on your phone?"
he's totally unfazed if you scream at him, which angers you even more and then burst into tears, because why is he so??
he would kiss belly, especially if you're ticklish, just to make you smile a little
paul aron | hitech —> bwt alpine reserve driver
actually enjoys this immensely
he feels useful and that makes him feel good about himself and your relationship
snack run? watch him storm out of the apartment in seconds
blood stain? more than glad to wash your covers
takes this opportunity to bring more blankets and tuck you in
would go absolutely feral if you're particularly sensitive during this time
has to touch you all the time, just to make sure nothing bad happens to you
right? hm, sure. totally not bc he wants to see you squirm a little, nope
pepe marti | campos, redbull academy
resident boyfriend material
but so so smug about it!!!
would be disgustingly overprepared and proud of himself, bragging about what a great partner he is
especially if you get emotional about it (hormones can be rough ugh)
stops yapping once he realises you’re serious and in need some comfort
you’re in his lap in seconds, his warm arms hugging your frame
i would picture him shirtless, trying to give you as much warmth as he can as you cuddle into the late hours of the night
luke browning | hitech —> f2
that’s, my friends, a classic gentleman
he’s quite known for being close with his family, very down to earth, and mature
so i think that attitude would extend to taking care of you during those few difficult days
i picture him calling his mum to ask how to be there for you
he's very perceptive, any gaps in his knowledge are quickly filled by his keen observations and eagerness to learn
would search the internet for cramp remedies and end up with some oddly specific ridiculous one
it's either a miracle or a total disaster, but he manages to bring a smile to your face every time, so he's satisfied
let me know if you'd like more content like that or any drivers you'd like me to write for
masterlist
#formula 2#formula two#formula racing#formula 2 x reader#formula e#ollie bearman x reader#ollie bearman#ollie bearman x y/n#andrea kimi antonelli#kimi antonelli x reader#kimi antonelli#zane maloney#zane maloney x reader#paul aron#paul aron x reader#paul aron fluff#pepe marti#pepe marti x reader#luke browning#luke browning x reader#hitech#headacanon#headcanons#f1 headcanons#formula 1 x reader#formula 1#haas f1 team#williams racing#mercedes amg petronas#mercedes amg f1
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